Oh it's taking so long
I could be wrong, I could be ready
Oh but if I take my heart's advice
I should assume it's still unsteady
I am in repair


(confusions..)


when you are confused between friendship or love, would you see the line that separates them? guess not..







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All the sweetness served my heart with reasons to awaken. Yet now I'm leaving. Let me just forget that I was inclined to like you. and like you more than I can like you. and then I can just treat you as my treasured friend. No complications. No confusions. No lines to break. One straight road.



















(take calls)

out of my so many everyday thoughts, i think you are the one dominant..

(a tune playing in my mind.. "why can't we be friends, why can't we be friends".. was sang in bridge to terabithia..)














do you know what's worth doing in life?
only the thing that you're passionate of :)



i am just in a state of nostalgia.. kept thinking of randon reasons why I am happy right at this moment..


anyway, for the purposes of looking back, i'll be posting pictures I got from them..











this is team lee -- dark angels.. my teammates from my work place., they certainly are one of the newest reasons of my happiness. can't leave work because of them..






this is us -- reybee, edward and alice, panget, whatever you call us.. hmm.. (silence) eternal sibs.. (smiles)







this is TG -- old mems :) guy next to me in white is bunsoy, gurl kneeling in front holding sonething blue is blest.. TG, always my refuge, no matter where and what i'm going through.. haha (drama)






this is yhin (with keith, haha) -- my counterpart, my better half (hmm, as friends syempre,haha) :( missing her soooo badly..











this is jbark.. forever friends. look at our pictures.. you'll know we're crazy together just by the looks of us..






this is tol.. -- one of my dearest at my workplace.. miss her..













well, my life couldn't be summed up by these pictures or any pictures for that matter.
looking forward to updating my blog frequently.. (well since i mostly spend my extra time reading, texting or sleeping, watching movies, i cannot promise,haha)






(sudden shift of thought)



i gave myself til february this year. that i'll meet him..
hmm.. i don't know if I really met him..
signs.. attraction.. gravity.. energy.. hahaha






oh well, life..


















(song in my mind still playing, why can't we be friends, why can't we be friends, haha)














life is meant to be fun. what with all those apocalypses predictions (plase don't take this as an offense for all the religins out there) and sad world moments, life is supposed to still give us a reason to stay smiling. well guess I'm really lucky when it comes to that part.i always get the best people around me..



dark angels..
blest..
ridara..
jbark..
yhin..
tol..
less than 3..




whew, like i can never thank Papa enough for all of these..
glad i'm favored :)











all of us, let's declare happiness!Ü

there will always come a time that we need to be reminded by things.. that is why I am reposting this article.. (feb '09 post, title: making my reality)

I just had quite a misunderstanding with someone from my workplace, and it really hurt me a lot.
why? because that person is someone very likeable. really likeable. and I thought that we were okay (well maybe we were) not after I said the following words. ..

Is that a question or a statement?


(deep sigh)


I cried hours during that day. I'm spend an hour crying before starting my work, crying while doing my calls, and will cry more later I know. It's just that I don't even mean anything bad (even a bit) of what I made that person feel with what I said, but I still made her feel worst. And it feels total agony.













I don't know how to say sorry. She is very angry and I can do nothing about it.
I offended her sooOo much.
I don't know.

Was it the way I spoke?
Was it because you were very tired that moment and you thought I disrespected you?
really, i mean no offense. if it's my freaking high pitched normal talking voice that makes people think i'm MAARTE or if it was my unwitty choice of words because that statement seem very normal for me, i really am not sure. but i really wanted to tell you I'm sorry. If you're someone I don't care and even know of, I might not even be hurt like this. but it's just that, every time this issue enters my mind, it reminds me of those moments that we were happy..

we're not best friends or even buddies..
but more than just acquaintances you just met and nod heads with.








Sorry. I know I've offended you. It might sound like crap, but I really, really did not mean it. Hope we could still reconcile in the future..

I just had quite a misunderstanding with someone from my workplace, and it really hurt me a lot.
why? because that person is someone very likeable. really likeable. and I thought that we were okay (well maybe we were) not after I said the following words. ..

Is that a question or a statement?


(deep sigh)


I cried hours during that day. I'm spend an hour crying before starting my work, crying while doing my calls, and will cry more later I know. It's just that I don't even mean anything bad (even a bit) of what I made that person feel with what I said, but I still made her feel worst. And it feels total agony.













I don't know how to say sorry. She is very angry and I can do nothing about it.
I offended her sooOo much.
I don't know.

Was it the way I spoke?
Was it because you were very tired that moment and you thought I disrespected you?
really, i mean no offense. if it's my freaking high pitched normal talking voice that makes people think i'm MAARTE or if it was my unwitty choice of words because that statement seem very normal for me, i really am not sure. but i really wanted to tell you I'm sorry. If you're someone I don't care and even know of, I might not even be hurt like this. but it's just that, every time this issue enters my mind, it reminds me of those moments that we were happy..

we're not best friends or even buddies..
but more than just acquaintances you just met and nod heads with.








Sorry. I know I've offended you. It might sound like crap, but I really, really did not mean it. Hope we could still reconcile in the future..

every long lost dream lead me to where you are. others who broke my heart they were like northern stars, pointing me on my way into your loving arms. this much i konw is true...
that God bless the broken road that led me straight to you..














an i-just-met person told me, "You will continously experience the lesson that you refuse to learn". Those lines left their mark in me. Yes. I will continue breaking my heart until I learned to wait for the man who will truly earn my love.

i could be beaten by doctors by the title i just typed for this post. haha who cares? i'm entitled to liberty once in a while..



facebook mafia-this is what i'm currently doing..
later i'll have to finish my explanation why i had incurred tardiness for my technical training.. (c'mon.. be positive chel!)
i have just sent my resignation for my former company.. (where i worked i think for less than two months?waaa)
i'll be AGAIN taking my technical certification in two weeks time. 9even if i'm already certified). sometimes you'll just have take the consequences or should i day requirements of the things that you really want, however hard thwy might seem at the beginning. well ou'll never know if that's what you realy wanted unless you give it a shot. and A SHOT means really going for it and not just going through preliminaries.


pause: loading my playlist which consists of louder, rougher music.. -- basic relief therapy of rachel..


regained a bit of health. (alert: chel needs to eat LOADS now.. haha i'm dead hungry!



what's running in my mind at the moment:
danes my former product trainer is cute..
i miss my barkada..
thinking when will I oen my accounting books again..
nervous for the upcoming certification..






needs more prayer.. - ultimate health strategy..










-------back to the normal world..